I’ve been listening to folk music all night and watching the cars pass over this bridge.

It’s freezing but my heart and lungs are warm from all of the harmful things I’ve consumed.

This is the present, but I feel like I’m 19 again. Making the same poor decisions and letting down the same people. If life is a cycle that goes full turn every two years, I’m out of luck.

There is a shout from overhead and the voice sounds uneasy and deep. Inquires about my current state and I reply that I’m fine.

I’m not fine. I’m not bad, but I’m not fine. Now you ask me how I feel and honesty is something that is slipping away. It’s a fleeting concept and I’ve always been about following trends.

I wish I didn’t have a bad name and a track record that proceeded me. I wish I was as elusive as you when it came to people and stoic when it came to emotions.

Instead I’m an erratic boy under a bridge in December wishing I was older and someone else. I’m not sure there’s a folk song about this.